I have always believed that there was a plan for each of us, and whether you buy into the idea of a higher power, or God, I would bet there were times you thought the same. As much as we humans like to think we are in charge, things happen that sometimes seem illogical, unpredictable, or unexpected, but seem so right at the same time (or maybe not). Sometimes these events frustrate us, the possibilities intrigue us, and perhaps, despite the warning signs, we forge blindly ahead, without much in the way of a road map or a direction. These are the times that we put our trust in God, or fate, and wait expectantly to see what could happen next.
Then there are the times when a choice must be made, and since I have been taught that God gifted humans with “free will”, I see this as the sticky wicket of fate . This, my friends, is where trouble resides. It’s when that “best laid plans” thing bites us and we must live with our choices, or adjust. In adjusting, we create a new fate – but again, we are fated to live out the mistakes, the choices, the successes. Damn, life is complicated!
Over the past few months, I have contemplated the idea of fate, or destiny. Hearing so many times that you find yourself exactly where you are meant to be, the changes afoot in my life boggle my mind and keep me on an unsure footing. Every day introduces a totally new challenge requiring creativity, a fresh approach, a learning curve, and tremendous emotional strength that is almost too much. But apparently, I am where I am meant to be – or so they say.
As I approach 60, I realize that fate disguises itself as health concerns, career decisions, and future planning, all of which hold one hostage at a moment’s notice. The day has passed where I breezed through life, thinking that I had it all in hand. Any plan in place presents itself a sitting duck to “fate”, ready to be reconfigured with the unexpected. To survive it all without a fatalistic viewpoint requires a taste for adventure and a solid ability to problem solve to combat the sirens’ song of giving up.
And so, in my life, fate presented a crossroad to be navigated so I engaged professional assistance. Before making the choice to leave the position I have held for years to assume a larger role in a totally new place, I sought the input of a fortune teller. With a deck of tarot cards as a guide, and a few leading questions, she quickly homed in on my dilemma. She began her reading with an incredulous “Why would you do this to yourself at this age?”, verbalizing my feelings exactly. As I pulled cards in sets of four, we explored the breadth of the possibilities and by the end, her comment morphed into “Why wouldn’t you do this?” While this was not the final word on my decision, I have heard her words in my mind’s ear, revisiting them frequently since our meeting. In essence, this moment presented the ultimate in seizing my fate.
In her last words to me, the tarot card reader admonished me that there would be regrets, but that there would be regrets with a decision in either direction. If ever there was a non-answer, this was it – and I paid for it! But, in essence, that is fate – life moving forward with the understanding that there may be regrets, but new and different opportunities to bring your “A” game, because where ever you are, it is where you are meant to be.